In the West Wing or This First Night
by HisLight.InMe
Summary: A glimpse into the mind of The Beast on that first fateful night that Belle was in the castle. One Shot. Please Read and Review, but always enjoy!


**In the West Wing or This First Night **

The Beast tossed in his bed. The cold wind blew in from the open balcony. It mixed with the fire that roared close to him. An odd sensation of hot and cold made his body feel awake and sleepy at the same time. He never slept well but this night was worse than usual. That girl was downstairs, sleeping or crying.

He ran a paw over his eyes. "I was too hasty in imprisoning her father. Too hasty in letting her take his place. I let, _It_, take control again." _It _was the monster that lived inside, the reason he was a beast. This was not something that he had gained after the fairy changed him, it was something that he had always had. That's what made his torment so much worse, he wasn't a monster because of how he looked. No, he was a monster on the inside first.

A loud growl slipped through his clinched jaw. Oh, how he hated himself. No wonder she hated him too. He saw it. The look that she gave him when he took her father away was that of hate.

"But," he said, swinging his hind legs over the side of the bed. There was no use even trying to sleep this first night. "There was something else in those eyes." A selflessness that he did not begin to understand.

"She didn't have to make the choice that she did. Yet she made it without a second thought," he whispered, getting to his feet. He walked to the little table where his magic mirror lay. Taking it in his paw, he opened his mouth ready to order it to show her to him, but he stopped. He knew what it would show him: a tear stained face. That face haunted him. She was in the middle of her grief and he needed to let her have it in private. He laid the mirror back down and walked out on to the balcony.

"Those eyes," he said, looking up at the starry night sky. Never had he seen anything so powerfully beautiful as her. A strange feeling filled his chest. A feeling he had not felt since he was…a man. He looked down at what used to be his hands, now nothing but fur and claws. He blew all the air out of his lungs, trying to push that feeling out of himself. She would never be able to return it.

"Let yourself go hard towards her," he said. Staying hard had protected him even when he was a boy. He needed it even more now, to keep himself from being hurt by her.

There was a sound behind him. It wasn't much. He might not have looked around but then he smelled, her. He turned to find Belle standing in his room reaching out to touch _the rose._

For a moment he was surprised. He wondered if his senses were betraying him, but no, it was not his senses that were betraying him.

The rose was his only thought. He leaped forward trying to save it. Taking up the bell jar, he closed it over the delicate, wilting blossom. He growled, the animal in him coming out, he had to protect it from the intruder.

"Why did you come here?" he asked, suspicion tightening his eyes.

"I'm sorry," she said quickly, breathing hard and backing away.

"I warned you never to come here." He leaned his head forward and glared into her face. He punctuated his words by throwing his arms wide, growing to his full height.

"I didn't mean any harm." Her voice was quivery as if she might cry, he ignored it. If she had succeeded in touching the rose or if she had taken it…

"Do you realize what you could have done?" he yelled. Anger surged through him, he lashed out, smashing a table.

"Please stop," she said, her eyes wide with fear. She put a hand over her mouth as if to hold in a scream.

He didn't want her here. In his sanctuary, touching _his _things. "Get out!" he yelled, smashing his wardrobe and a chest of draws. "Get OUT!!!!"

She ran from the room, her frightened cries deaf to his ears until she was gone. Then they seemed to echo through the room. Suddenly with his precious belongings no longer in danger, Belle's terrified face flashed into his mind. Then, her face just before he had interrupted her, it had been that of curiosity and wonder. He seemed to remember how delicately her fingers had been reaching to touch the petals of the rose.

Pain filled the Beast's chest as he realized what he had done. She had not been an intruder, but a scared and curious girl. She had even shown bravery in coming. He laid his face in a paw. He knew the angry fact that the monster within was the true master of this castle.

"But not anymore," he whispered. "Not anymore."


End file.
